eBook downloads, eBook resources & eBook authors
All parents want their children to be happy. But many couples today go too far, letting everything revolve around their kids. This hurts the children and the marriage. The good news is you don't have to choose between your spouse and your kids. Drawing from the latest research in neuroscience and his study of families around the world, David Code explains why putting your marriage first actually produces happier kids.
Raising children is one of life's greatest joys, but the impact of introducing a child into a marriage is staggering. Many couples don't realize the relational stress that parenting can cause. Most parents experience decreased intimacy and increased conflict. They may even find themselves asking, "Am I still in love?" When Two Become Three helps couples recognize the inevitable challenges to their relationship that occur during the childrearing years. It provides practical advice designed to help couples nurture their marital relationship in order to ensure it remains strong during this phase of life and beyond.
"Get this for your pregnant friends, or yourself" (People): a hilariously candid account of one woman's quest to bring her post-baby marriage back from the brink, with life-changing, real-world advice. Recommended by Nicole Cliffe in Slate Featured in People Picks A Red Tricycle Best Baby and Toddler Parenting Book of the Year One of Mother magazine's favorite parenting books of the Year How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids tackles the last taboo subject of parenthood: the startling, white-hot fury that new (and not-so-new) mothers often have for their mates. After Jancee Dunn had her baby, she found that she was doing virtually all the household chores, even though she and her husband worked equal hours. She asked herself: How did I become the 'expert' at changing a diaper? Many expectant parents spend weeks researching the best crib or safest car seat, but spend little if any time thinking about the titanic impact the baby will have on their marriage - and the way their marriage will affect their child. Enter Dunn, her well-meaning but blithely unhelpful husband, their daughter, and her boisterous extended family, who show us the ways in which outmoded family patterns and traditions thwart the overworked, overloaded parents of today. On the brink of marital Armageddon, Dunn plunges into the latest relationship research, solicits the counsel of the country's most renowned couples' and sex therapists, canvasses fellow parents, and even consults an FBI hostage negotiator on how to effectively contain an "explosive situation." Instead of having the same fights over and over, Dunn and her husband must figure out a way to resolve their larger issues and fix their family while there is still time. As they discover, adding a demanding new person to your relationship means you have to reevaluate -- and rebuild -- your marriage. In an exhilarating twist, they work together to save the day, happily returning to the kind of peaceful life they previously thought was the sole province of couples without children. Part memoir, part self-help book with actionable and achievable advice, How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids is an eye-opening look at how the man who got you into this position in this first place is the ally you didn't know you had.
How are your children learning about intimacy? What are they seeing when they watch you interacting with your spouse? In a ground breaking approach to family dynamics, What Children Learn from Their Parents' Marriage shows how a child's perception of the marriage his or her parents have created is the key to his or her psychological development and ultimate well-being. Talking to both intact families and divorcing couples with children, marriage and family therapist Judith P. Sigel identifies seven essential elements of marriage that determine the emotional health of a child. By combining her own work with the most current research, Dr. Siegal presents an eye-opening and highly readable book -- one that offers illuminating insight for parents everywhere who wish to build the secure foundation their children need for an emotionally healthy future.
This Is the Story of a Happy Marriage is an irresistible blend of literature and memoir revealing the big experiences and little moments that shaped Ann Patchett as a daughter, wife, friend and writer. Here, Ann Patchett shares entertaining and moving stories about her tumultuous childhood, her painful early divorce, the excitement of selling her first book, driving a Winnebago from Montana to Yellowstone Park, her joyous discovery of opera, scaling a six-foot wall in order to join the Los Angeles Police Department, the gradual loss of her beloved grandmother, starting her own bookshop in Nashville, her love for her very special dog and, of course, her eventual happy marriage. This Is the Story of a Happy Marriage is a memoir both wide ranging and deeply personal, overflowing with close observation and emotional wisdom, told with wit, honesty and irresistible warmth.
The first book to address the subject of divorce specifically from a child's point of view, this is the result of two years' work by twenty school children between the ages of eleven and fourteen in an open school in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Fourteen of the children had experienced their parents' divorces; the other six worried constantly that their parents might separate. Realizing that all twenty of them had strong feelings on the subject which they had never been encouraged to express, their classroom teacher, Eric Rofes, began a series of discussion groups and assigned supplementary reading. As the project grew, the children interviewed counselors, judges, other children and members of the clergy. In the book that ultimately emerged, they offer advice on everything from how to avoid taking sides to how to deal with parents' new relationships, stepparents and gay parents. They describe the legal process of divorce in language a child can understand and cover such subjects as handling a new living situation, holidays (always difficult), visiting arrangements and how to get support from friends, relatives or counselors.
Based on a landmark longitudinal study, the nation's leading expert on stepfamilies reveals his breakthrough findings and offers the first detailed guide to easing the conflicts of stepfamily life and healing the scars of divorce. There are more than twenty million stepfamilies in America. For most of them, the simple, daily issues that challenge every family are even more anxiety-provoking. After conducting a comprehensive nine-year-long study funded by the National Institutes of Health, Dr. James H. Bray has written an invaluable book that explains why over half of all stepfamilies fail and reveals the strategies that help the others succeed. A stepfamily is assaulted on all sides by difficult and often divisive questions. How much control should a stepparent have over a stepchild? How much authority should a nonresidential parent exert over a child? How should a difficult former spouse be handled? How does an "ours" baby change the emotional dynamic in a stepfamily? Why is there a lack of "honeymoon effect" during the first years of stepfamily life? The purpose of Stepfamilies is to answer all the important questions of stepfamily life--to fill in the knowledge gaps that undermine so many stepfamilies today and, crucially, to learn the effect of stepfamily life on children. Based on one of the largest and longest studies of stepfamily life ever conducted, Stepfamilies interweaves the stories of real families to illustrate such study findings as how: a stepfamily has its own natural life cycle a stepfamily takes several years to develop into a family unit a stepfamily is at greatest risk during the first two years a stepfamily ultimately coalesces into one of three forms a stepfamily must solve four basic tasks in order to succeed a stepfamily can help heal the scars of divorce Filled with emotional, gripping stories, Bray's findings pinpoint the three major transitions in stepfamily life and identify the riskiest issues that can throw a family into crisis. Bray is the first to identify the several distinct forms that stepfamilies take and to explore which types of stepfamilies are more vulnerable than others and why. He also describes the natural life cycle of stepfamilies and basic tasks all stepfamilies must undertake to succeed. With a wealth of insight into the positive effects of remarriage, Bray shows how a loving, well-functioning stepfamily can lessen the trauma of divorce and restore a child's and family's sense of security. Most stepparents remarry with the highest hopes and new resolutions for a better life. Never before have their unique needs been addressed in depth. Through insightful case studies and practical advice, Stepfamilies reveals how a strong, stable stepfamily is as capable as a nuclear family of nurturing healthy development, of imbuing values, of setting limits and boundaries, and of providing a structure in which rules for living a moral and productive life are transmitted, tested, rebelled against, and ultimately affirmed. Bray's positive message and fascinating findings--many of which defy intuition--will put stepfamilies on the road to lifelong harmony.
Featured on Oprah and excerpted in Glamour magazine, this exploration of the positive and negative effects the birth of a child has on a marriage is based on the largest, most comprehensive study of couples entering parenthood ever conducted.
