When Empathy Fails

2018-03-12

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Author: Kathy Marshack
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781979969000
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 554

Have you ever... - Felt victimized, been swindled or lied to by your best friend; - Loaned money to loved ones who squandered the gift and never paid you back; - Had to fight unscrupulous prosecutors for your freedom; - Been forced to defend yourself from your vengeful ex or your ungrateful children; - Bumped into a beguiling, but shifty, stranger? If so, you've crossed paths with someone operating with Empathy Dysfunction (EmD). In this book, psychologist, Dr. Kathy Marshack, helps you not only understand why this is happening, but how to protect yourself from those hell-bent on destroying you. Narcissists, sociopaths, addicts, brain injured, autistics, a vengeful ex, corrupt city officials and greedy neighbors. What do these people have in common? According to Licensed Psychologist, Dr. Kathy Marshack, they all lack empathy. She ought to know. She endured a 12-year perfect storm of divorce, lawsuits, assaults, cyberstalking, false arrests, predatory prosecution, and the loss of her children to parental alienation. Throughout all these experiences she noticed there was a common theme, namely people with Empathy Dysfunction (EmD). Dr. Kathy Marshack does more than share her unbelievable true story, she shares: - Hard-learned lessons on how to stand up for yourself when dealing with people who could literally care less about you. - A way to identify those with a dysfunctional lack of empathy using the new Empathy Dysfunction Scale (EmD Scale), so you can shield yourself from the destruction they leave in their wake. - Clues you should never ignore for your own safety - like a rotten neighbor, friends who start believing the nasty gossip spread by your ex-partner, or a nagging feeling you're being watched. Pay attention, it may be because "they" really are out to get you. - Warrior training to protect yourself from dangerous people. If you've been hurt just once, or maybe too many times to count, by a person with EmD, apply the warrior training in this book, increase your own empathy to a higher level, and reclaim the beautiful life you are meant to live.

Infant Crying

2012-12-06

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Author: C.F.Z. Boukydis
Publisher: Springer Science & Business Media
ISBN: 1461323819
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 385

The cries of infants and children are familiar to essentially all adults, and we all have our own common sense notions of the meanings of various cries at each age level. As is often the case, in the study of various aspects ofhuman behavior we often investigate what seems self evident to the general public. For example,if an infant cries, he or she needs atttention;if the cry is different than usual, he or she is sick; and when we areupsetby othermatters, children's crying can be very annoy ing. As a pediatric clinician often faced with discussing with parents their concerns or lack of them with respect to their children's crying, these usual commonsense interpretations were frequently inadequate. As this book illustrates, when we investigate such everyday behaviors as children's crying and adults' responses to crying, the nature of the problem becomes surprisingly complex. As a pediatrician working in the newborn nursery early in my career, I knew from pediatric textbooks and from nursery nurses, that newborn infants with high, piercing cries were often abnormal. In order to teach this interestingphenomenon to others and tounderstand under what circumstances it occurred, I found I needed to know what consti tuted a high-pitched cry or even a normal cry, for that matter, and how often this occurred with sick infants. Certainly I saw sick infants who did not have high-pitched cries, but I still wonderedif their cries were deviant in some other way.

Against Empathy

2016-12-06

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Author: Paul Bloom
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0062339354
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 190

New York Post Best Book of 2016 We often think of our capacity to experience the suffering of others as the ultimate source of goodness. Many of our wisest policy-makers, activists, scientists, and philosophers agree that the only problem with empathy is that we don’t have enough of it. Nothing could be farther from the truth, argues Yale researcher Paul Bloom. In AGAINST EMPATHY, Bloom reveals empathy to be one of the leading motivators of inequality and immorality in society. Far from helping us to improve the lives of others, empathy is a capricious and irrational emotion that appeals to our narrow prejudices. It muddles our judgment and, ironically, often leads to cruelty. We are at our best when we are smart enough not to rely on it, but to draw instead upon a more distanced compassion. Basing his argument on groundbreaking scientific findings, Bloom makes the case that some of the worst decisions made by individuals and nations—who to give money to, when to go to war, how to respond to climate change, and who to imprison—are too often motivated by honest, yet misplaced, emotions. With precision and wit, he demonstrates how empathy distorts our judgment in every aspect of our lives, from philanthropy and charity to the justice system; from medical care and education to parenting and marriage. Without empathy, Bloom insists, our decisions would be clearer, fairer, and—yes—ultimately more moral. Brilliantly argued, urgent and humane, AGAINST EMPATHY shows us that, when it comes to both major policy decisions and the choices we make in our everyday lives, limiting our impulse toward empathy is often the most compassionate choice we can make.

Mindwise

2014-02-11

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Author: Nicholas Epley
Publisher: Vintage
ISBN: 0385351674
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 273

You are a mind reader, born with an extraordinary ability to understand what others think, feel, believe, want, and know. It’s a sixth sense you use every day, in every personal and professional relationship you have. At its best, this ability allows you to achieve the most important goal in almost any life: connecting, deeply and intimately and honestly, to other human beings. At its worst, it is a source of misunderstanding and unnecessary conflict, leading to damaged relationships and broken dreams. How good are you at knowing the minds of others? How well can you guess what others think of you, know who really likes you, or tell when someone is lying? How well do you really understand the minds of those closest to you, from your spouse to your kids to your best friends? Do you really know what your coworkers, employees, competitors, or clients want? In this illuminating exploration of one of the great mysteries of the human mind, University of Chicago psychologist Nicholas Epley introduces us to what scientists have learned about our ability to understand the most complicated puzzle on the planet—other people—and the surprising mistakes we so routinely make. Why are we sometimes blind to the minds of others, treating them like objects or animals? Why do we sometimes talk to our cars, or the stars, as if there is a mind that can hear us? Why do we so routinely believe that others think, feel, and want what we do when, in fact, they do not? And why do we believe we understand our spouses, family, and friends so much better than we actually do? Mindwise will not turn other people into open books, but it will give you the wisdom to revolutionize how you think about them—and yourself.

Radical Candor

2017-03-28

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Author: Kim Malone Scott
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 1760553026
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 375

Radical Candor is the sweet spot between managers who are obnoxiously aggressive on the one side and ruinously empathetic on the other. It is about providing guidance, which involves a mix of praise as well as criticism, delivered to produce better results and help employees develop their skills and boundaries of success. Great bosses have a strong relationship with their employees, and Kim Scott Malone has identified three simple principles for building better relationships with your employees: make it personal, get stuff done, and understand why it matters. Radical Candor offers a guide to those bewildered or exhausted by management, written for bosses and those who manage bosses. Drawing on years of first-hand experience, and distilled clearly to give actionable lessons to the reader, Radical Candor shows how to be successful while retaining your integrity and humanity. Radical Candor is the perfect handbook for those who are looking to find meaning in their job and create an environment where people both love their work, their colleagues and are motivated to strive to ever greater success.

Beyond the White Negro

2014-07-15

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Author: Kimberly Chabot Davis
Publisher: University of Illinois Press
ISBN: 0252096312
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 273

Critics often characterize white consumption of African American culture as a form of theft that echoes the fantasies of 1950s-era bohemians, or "White Negroes," who romanticized black culture as anarchic and sexually potent. In Beyond the White Negro, Kimberly Chabot Davis claims such a view fails to describe the varied politics of racial crossover in the past fifteen years. Davis analyzes how white engagement with African American novels, film narratives, and hip-hop can help form anti-racist attitudes that may catalyze social change and racial justice. Though acknowledging past failures to establish cross-racial empathy, she focuses on examples that show avenues for future progress and change. Her study of ethnographic data from book clubs and college classrooms shows how engagement with African American culture and pedagogical support can lead to the kinds of white self-examination that make empathy possible. The result is a groundbreaking text that challenges the trend of focusing on society's failures in achieving cross-racial empathy and instead explores possible avenues for change.

Empathy and the Historical Understanding of the Human Past

2020-04-08

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Author: Thomas A. Kohut
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 100004498X
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 231

Empathy and the Historical Understanding of the Human Past is a comprehensive consideration of the role of empathy in historical knowledge, informed by the literature on empathy in fields including history, psychoanalysis, psychology, neuroscience, philosophy, and sociology. The book seeks to raise the consciousness of historians about empathy, by introducing them to the history of the concept and to its status in fields outside of history. It also seeks to raise the self-consciousness of historians about their use of empathy to know and understand past people. Defining empathy as thinking and feeling, as imagining, one’s way inside the experience of others in order to know and understand them, Thomas A. Kohut distinguishes between the external and the empathic observational position, the position of the historical subject. He argues that historians need to be aware of their observational position, of when they are empathizing and when they are not. Indeed, Kohut advocates for the deliberate, self-reflective use of empathy as a legitimate and important mode of historical inquiry. Insightful, cogent, and interdisciplinary, the book will be essential for historians, students of history, and psychoanalysts, as well as those in other fields who seek to seek to know and understand human beings.

Out of Mind - Out of Sight

2013-10-22

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Author: Kathy J. Marshack
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781481930888
Category : Asperger's syndrome
Languages : en
Pages : 0

"Out of Mind - Out of Sight: Parenting with a Partner with Asperger Syndrome (ASD)," takes an honest look at the unique issues that come up when you're co-parenting with an Asperger partner. It's a tough assignment because for the Aspie (ASD) parent so many of the interactions within the family circle, that require empathy, are literally out of mind - out of sight. This is essential reading for the Neuro-Typical (NT) parent to learn more about Asperger Syndrome and find a way to co-parent, co-exist and even thrive within the Asperger/NT family unit. Author Kathy J. Marshack, Ph.D, is a licensed psychologist with more than 33 years of experience as a marriage and family therapist, and a parent of a daughter with AS. This book is a follow-up to her first book to explore Asperger relationships, Life with a Partner or Spouse with Asperger Syndrome: Going over the Edge? Practical Steps to Saving You and Your Relationship, which garnered worldwide attention due to its unforgivingly realistic portrayal of loving someone with Asperger's. Once again, in this new book readers will find it is not a quirky, upbeat human-interest story on Asperger Syndrome. Instead, Dr. Marshack doesn't pull back from revealing the harsh realities that a Neuro-Typical (NT) faces in parenting with someone who doesn't fully understand them or their children. However, she also provides hope and practical solutions on how to co-parent more successfully. How is an NT parent supposed to share the multi-dimensional work of parenting with a spouse who has no concept of the empathic glue that holds the parent/child relationship (and the parent/parent relationship) together? There are no shortcuts and no easy answers, but the question is explored in all its multi-faceted complexities. In the first part of the book, Dr. Marshack introduces the reader to the daily life of AS/NT co-parenting. There is no analysis, just raw emotional experiences that will resonate with readers who are living this life. Next, readers will be compelled to shed some of their preconceived notions as Dr. Marshack explains the science behind these troubling relationship as well as state of the art theories on Asperger Syndrome (ASD). At the end of the book Dr. Marshack provides specific techniques to help readers implement the changes they want and need to make to revive their marriage and their parenting as well as reclaim their personal freedom.

Empathy

2014-11-04

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Author: Roman Krznaric
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0698176049
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 274

Discover the Six Habits of Highly Empathic People A popular speaker and co-founder of The School of Life, Roman Krznaric has traveled the world researching and lecturing on the subject of empathy. In this lively and engaging book, he argues that our brains are wired for social connection. Empathy, not apathy or self-centeredness, is at the heart of who we are. By looking outward and attempting to identify with the experiences of others, Krznaric argues, we can become not only a more equal society, but also a happier and more creative one. Through encounters with groundbreaking actors, activists, designers, nurses, bankers and neuroscientists, Krznaric defines a new breed of adventurer. He presents the six life-enhancing habits of highly empathic people, whose skills enable them to connect with others in extraordinary ways – making themselves, and the world, more truly fulfilled.

The Writer's Practice

2019-02-05

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Author: John Warner
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0143133152
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 258

“Unique and thorough, Warner’s handbook could turn any determined reader into a regular Malcolm Gladwell.” —Booklist For anyone aiming to improve their skill as a writer, a revolutionary new approach to establishing robust writing practices inside and outside the classroom, from the author of Why They Can’t Write After a decade of teaching writing using the same methods he’d experienced as a student many years before, writer, editor, and educator John Warner realized he could do better. Drawing on his classroom experience and the most persuasive research in contemporary composition studies, he devised an innovative new framework: a step-by-step method that moves the student through a series of writing problems, an organic, bottom-up writing process that exposes and acculturates them to the ways writers work in the world. The time is right for this new and groundbreaking approach. The most popular books on composition take a formalistic view, utilizing “templates” in order to mimic the sorts of rhetorical moves academics make. While this is a valuable element of a writing education, there is room for something that speaks more broadly. The Writer’s Practice invites students and novice writers into an intellectually engaging, active learning process that prepares them for a wider range of academic and real-world writing and allows them to become invested and engaged in their own work.