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For parents and family members who live with a troubled child orteen, this is a fact-filled and practical guide for achievingstability and well-being by managing daily life in a stressfulhome.
This book is designed to enable practitioners to help children whose emotional wellbeing is being adversely affected by troubled parents. These are children who live with the burden of having to navigate their parent's troubled emotional states, often leaving them with a mass of painful feelings about a chaotic and disturbing world. They can feel alarmed by their parent rather than experiencing them as 'home', and a place of safety and solace. The author explores the fact that when parents are preoccupied with their own troubles, they are often unable to effectively address their child's core relational needs, e.g. soothing, validating, attunement, co-adventure, interactive play. As a result, children are left self-helping, which all too often means drugs, drink, self-harm, depression, anxiety, eating disorders or problems with anger in the teenage years. This guidebook offers readers a wealth of vital theory and effective interventions for working with these children and, specifically, the key feelings such children need help with. Particular focus is given to the effects on children of: family breakdown; separation and divorce; witnessing parents fighting; and parents who suffer from depression or anxiety, mental or physical ill-health, alcohol or drug addiction. Readers will learn: the complexity of children's feelings about their troubled parents; how to enable children to address their unspoken hurt, fear, grief, rage, and resentment about their troubled parent in order to move forward in their lives; how to empower children to find their voice when they have been left in the role of impotent bystander; effective parent-child intervention when parental troubles are adversely affecting the child; and how to help a parent and child 'find' each other again.
Offering supportive, practical advice from a leading child-life specialist, this book includes information such as what to tell a child about the illness, how to recognize early-warning signs in a child's drawings, sleep patterns, schoolwork and eating habits, and when and where to get professional help. Illustrations & Calvin & Hobbes cartoons.
Numerous books have been written for adults who grew up coping with troubled and difficult parents. Often the adults who read these books say, I wish someone had told me that when I was a kid; it might have helped me so much. Unfortunately, not much has been written for the kids who are coping in the present with difficult or troubled parents. This book is written out of the belief that intelligent kids can use sound ideas to improve their lives, either on their own or with the help of healthy adults. It will offer help in sorting out whether a difficult situation may be a result of a parent’s problems. In this new third edition, changes have been made throughout in order to update and refine the author’s ideas. Two new chapters have been added, as well. The first new chapter addresses parents who tell lies. Dishonest parents are motivated in several different ways, but all dishonest parents pose special problems for their children. The second chapter discusses the idea that all parents have problems some of the time. In this chapter, the author helps young people look at the challenges posed by recognizing that all parents, even excellent ones, have shortcomings, and it differentiates between the ordinary shortcomings that all parents have and more serious problems in parenting. This book is an excellent resource for therapists, school counselors, group leaders, and others who work with children and teenagers and who want reading materials to recommend to them.
A Road Map for Parenting in the Troubled Years It is never too late for parents to reach their teenager or young adult. Licensed counselor Connie Rae draws from professional and personal experience to provide insight, encouragement, and advice. Offering wise counsel and a reassuring tone, she helps parents better understand their child's temperament, their own parenting style, and the developmental process their child is going through. She also discusses the world in which their teenager is growing up, which is very different than many parents realize. Each chapter ends with a list of practical steps and a prayer, giving parents wise advice but also offering hope through the process.
Decades of research have demonstrated that the parent-child dyad and the environment of the familyâ€"which includes all primary caregiversâ€"are at the foundation of children's well- being and healthy development. From birth, children are learning and rely on parents and the other caregivers in their lives to protect and care for them. The impact of parents may never be greater than during the earliest years of life, when a child's brain is rapidly developing and when nearly all of her or his experiences are created and shaped by parents and the family environment. Parents help children build and refine their knowledge and skills, charting a trajectory for their health and well-being during childhood and beyond. The experience of parenting also impacts parents themselves. For instance, parenting can enrich and give focus to parents' lives; generate stress or calm; and create any number of emotions, including feelings of happiness, sadness, fulfillment, and anger. Parenting of young children today takes place in the context of significant ongoing developments. These include: a rapidly growing body of science on early childhood, increases in funding for programs and services for families, changing demographics of the U.S. population, and greater diversity of family structure. Additionally, parenting is increasingly being shaped by technology and increased access to information about parenting. Parenting Matters identifies parenting knowledge, attitudes, and practices associated with positive developmental outcomes in children ages 0-8; universal/preventive and targeted strategies used in a variety of settings that have been effective with parents of young children and that support the identified knowledge, attitudes, and practices; and barriers to and facilitators for parents' use of practices that lead to healthy child outcomes as well as their participation in effective programs and services. This report makes recommendations directed at an array of stakeholders, for promoting the wide-scale adoption of effective programs and services for parents and on areas that warrant further research to inform policy and practice. It is meant to serve as a roadmap for the future of parenting policy, research, and practice in the United States.
This practical guidebook, with a beautifully-illustrated storybook, enables teachers, parents and professionals to help children aged 4-12 connect with unresolved feelings affecting their behaviour. This is a guide book to help children who suffer the effects of: fFamily breakdown, separation and divorce, and witnessing parents fighting. It is suitable for Parents who suffer from depression or anxiety, mental or physical ill-health, alcohol or drug addiction. Monica Plum's Horrid Problem is a story for children with troubled parents. Monica Plus has a horrid problem. It gets everywhere: into her school work, her dreams, her ability to make friends. People keep telling her to cheer up. She can't. She feels as if she is carrying around some very heavy luggage. Then one day, a helpful teacher sees how miserable Monica is, and tells her about the knights in the world, who are posing as people. In a whispering wood, Monica finds some of these knights. They teach her how to make her problem far less horrid. In particular they show her how to cope when other people's problems weigh you down and make you feel miserable. Most importantly they show her how to do life well. Monica leaves whispering wood feeling empowered and ready to face what she could not face before.
Solve typical toddler challenges with eight key mindshifts that will help you parent with clarity, calmness and self-control. Through stories from her practice, Claire Lerner shows parents how making critical mindshifts—seeing their children’s behaviors through a new lens —empowers parents to solve their most vexing childrearing challenges. This process puts parents back in the driver’s seat, where they belong and where their children need them to be. These real life stories provide a roadmap for how to tune into the root causes of children’s behavior and how to create and implement strategies that are tailored to the unique needs of each child and family. Through these stories, Claire provides a treasure trove of practical solutions that are based in science and which work in real life. Why Is My Child In Charge? picks up where other books have left parents hanging. Most parenting books offer solutions that sound good on paper but don’t work in practice. They are aspirational rather than achievable, or they offer one-size-fits-all approaches that don’t meet the needs of an individual child. They can compound parents’ feelings of frustration and thus, can be counterproductive. Case by case, Claire unpacks the individualized process she guides parents through to solve the most common challenges such as throwing tantrums in public; delaying bedtime for hours; refusing to participate in family mealtimes; and resisting potty training. Employing a relatable story-telling approach, Claire elucidates: The faulty mindsets that pose obstacles to parents seeing the situation more objectively The essential mindshifts that enable parents to quickly identify the root causes of the problem The development of an action plan tailored to each unique child and family Why is My Child in Charge? is like having a child development specialist in your home. It shows how you can develop “win-win” strategies that translate into adaptable, happy kids and calm, connected and in-control parents. It will help you be the parent you want to be.
People who wouldn't dream of blaming parents for a child's asthma or diabetes are often quick to blame bad parenting for a child's hyperactivity, depression, or school phobia. The parents, in turn, often blame their children, believing that they're lazy or rebellious. Even worse, the children with these psychological problems often blame themselves, convinced that they're just bad kids. In It's Nobody's Fault, esteemed child and adolescent psychiatrist Dr. Harold S. Kopelwicz at last puts an end to this pointless--and erroneous--cycle of blame and helps parents get the help they need for their troubled children. Written in an easy, anecdotal style and filled with fascinating stories of real children and their parents, It's Nobody's Fault is an indispensable guide for anyone who lives or works with children who need help.
