Crap CVs

2014-10-09
Crap CVs

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  • Author: Jenny Crompton
  • Publisher: Penguin UK
  • ISBN: 1405920459
  • Category : Business & Economics
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 131

A HILARIOUS COMPILATION OF THE WORST JOB APPLICATIONS IMAGINABLE - A PERFECT STOCKING FILLER OR OFFICE SECRET SANTA GIFT THIS CHRISTMAS. Ever read a truly terrible job application? Or perhaps slightly exaggerated the truth on one of your own... We've all been there - but these are worse. So much worse. From overly-honest cover letters, embarrassing typos, and mortifying personal revelations, to awkward interview questions, misplaced self-confidence, and, of course, outright lies. This hilarious collection of shockingly dreadful job applications, crap CVs and excruciating interviews will have you laughing out loud, while also making you feel so much better about yourself - because at least you weren't ever this bad . . . Application for Employment I refer to the recent death of the Technical Manager at your company and hereby apply for the replacement of the deceased manager. Each time I apply for a job, I get a reply that there is no vacancy but in this case I have caught you red-handed and you have no excuse because I even attended the funeral to be sure that he was truly dead and buried before applying. Attached to my letter is a copy of my CV and his death certificate. The Interview: Q. Is there anything about this job that you feel you might not be very good at? A. Dealing with people. Q. What person, living or dead, would you most like to meet? A. The living one.

EUGENE & COMPANY

2019-08-13
EUGENE & COMPANY

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  • Author: AMANDA BOEKELHEIDE
  • Publisher: Lulu.com
  • ISBN: 1792309104
  • Category :
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 84

Milli and Me

2008-11
Milli and Me

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  • Author: Michael Rosedale
  • Publisher: iUniverse
  • ISBN: 1440102724
  • Category : Humor
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 103

WHO WOULD READ THIS BOOK ANYWAY? (a special note from the Author) A lot of people have told me (including my wife and kids), that no one is ever going to want to read this dumb dog book. And, even if they were willing to read it, they told me for sure- no one would pay to read it. I'M NOT LISTENING TO THEM. I know most people like dogs more than they like people and spend a ton of money on doggie stuff because it makes them feel good. So for those of you who doubt there is a market for this book- here is the proof: At this very minute, as I am writing this, I am sitting on an American Airlines jet. I have just reached into the seat compartment in front of me and pulled out this SkyMall product catalog. Some of the products in this catalog I just found available for dog owners to buy- that will sell in the millions this year include: dog beds that keeps your dog stay cool and comfortable when resting, dog ramps that will help your dog get on your bed or sofa, portable dog feeders so your dog will never go hungry when you are not home on time from work, lotion that prevents dog tear stains under the eyes, fresh bowl savers- lids for doggie food bowls- to keep it fresh, poop boxes- the economical way to handle doggie waste, walk thru pet gates, doggie boosters for senior dogs- helps them get in and out of the cars easily, bark free- the safe way to prevent dogs from excessive barking, pet wheel away- take your dog whoever you go, back seat barriers- that keep your dogs safe in the car, the ultimate pet feeding and watering kit that prevents your dogs from overeating and here is my favorite- the personalized doggie garden bench - to honor your loved deceased dog. (I guess you bury your best friend in front or underneath the bench.) I rest my case. Buy this book and make yourself feel good - you will enjoy it! Sincerely- Michael Rosedale P.S. go to www.millirosedale.com and post YOUR favorite dog and pet stories. Maybe they will end up in my next book!!!!!!!!!!

Unwanted

2014-08-20
Unwanted

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  • Author: Sandra M. Bucerius
  • Publisher: Oxford University Press
  • ISBN: 0199856486
  • Category : Social Science
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 288

The immigration of Muslims to Europe and the integration of later generations presents many challenges to European societies. Unwanted builds on five years of ethnographic research with a group of fifty-five second-generation Muslim immigrant drug dealers in Frankfurt, Germany to examine the relationship between immigration, social exclusion, and the informal economy. Having spent countless hours with these young men, hanging out in the streets, in cafes or bars and at the local community center, Sandra Bucerius explores the intimate aspects of one of the most discriminated and excluded populations in Germany. Bucerius looks at how the young men negotiate their participation in the drug market while still trying to adhere to their cultural and religious obligations and how they struggle to find a place within German society. The young men considered their involvement in the drug trade a response to their exclusion at the same time that it provides a means of forging an identity and a place within German society. The insights into the lives, hopes, and dreams of these young men, who serve as an example for many Muslim and otherwise marginalized immigrant youth groups in Western countries, provides the context necessary to understand their actions while never obscuring the many contradictory facets of their lives.

Business Bullshit

2017-09-11
Business Bullshit

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  • Author: André Spicer
  • Publisher: Routledge
  • ISBN: 1317433289
  • Category : Business & Economics
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 212

Our organizations are flooded with empty talk. We are constantly "going forward" to lands of "deliverables", stopping off on the "journey" to "drill down" into "best practice". Being an expert at using management speak has become more important in corporate life than delivering long lasting results. The upshot is that meaningless corporate jargon is killing our organizations. In this book, management scholar the author argues we need to call this empty talk what it is: bullshit. The book looks at how organizations have become vast machines for manufacturing, distributing and consuming bullshit. It follows how the meaningless language of management has spread through schools, NGOs, politics and the media. Business Bullshit shows you how to spot business bullshit, considers why it is so popular, and outlines the impact it has on organizations and the people who work there. It also outlines what we can do to minimise bullshit at work. The author makes a case for why organizations need to avoid empty talk and reconnect with core activities.

Integrative Learning

2014-11-13
Integrative Learning

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  • Author: Daniel Blackshields
  • Publisher: Routledge
  • ISBN: 113464857X
  • Category : Education
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 323

Current teaching, learning and assessment practices can lead students to believe that courses within a programme are self-sufficient and separate. Integrative Learning explores this issue, and considers how intentional learning helps students become integrative thinkers who can see connections in seemingly disparate information, and draw on a wide range of knowledge to make decisions. Written by international contributors who engaged reflectively with their teaching and their students’ learning, the book seeks to develop a shared language of integrative learning, encouraging students to adapt skills learned in one situation to problems encountered in another, and make autonomous connections across courses, between experiences, and throughout their lives. More informed teachers can help students develop the necessary attributes for intentional learning, which include having a sense of purpose, fitting fragmentary information into a ‘learning framework’, understanding something of their own learning processes, asking probing questions, reflecting on their own choices, and knowing when to ask for help. Integrative Learning draws on international research and vast studies to provide the reader with the resources to ensure access to a unified learning experience. The book discusses conceptual and technical tools necessary for facilitating integrative learning across a range of disciplines as well as providing learning pedagogies and considers integrative learning in the context of the relevance of higher education in the complexity and uncertainty of the 21st century. It will appeal to academics and researchers in the field of higher education, as well as those generating higher education curriculums.

Acting: Cut the Crap, Cue the Truth

2013-11-21
Acting: Cut the Crap, Cue the Truth

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  • Author: Natalie Burt
  • Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
  • ISBN: 1849434956
  • Category : Performing Arts
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 415

Acting: Cut the Crap, Cue the Truth fills a gap in the drama school curriculum, tackling many areas which are unaddressed during training and discussing issues that are more often than not hushed up afterwards. Starting from the vital final stages of training, and on to life as a professional, Natalie Burt – a young, jobbing actress – moves systematically through the challenges that every actor faces; from making strategic career decisions, to the logistics of TV and film sets and voice over work, to more personal matters such as renting and flat-sharing, finance and well-being when out of work. Rejecting gimmicks and quick fixes, she encourages motivational thinking and entrepreneurialism using an informal, unapologetic and humorous tone whilst sharing information that is current, relevant and from the frontline. Or, as Natalie puts it, ‘a thorough, constructive and ball-achingly honest chat about the industry, written by someone who still has all their own teeth.’ Contributors to the book include Spotlight, Equity, James Penford from Hatton McEwan Penford agency and Alice Purser from Andy Pryor Casting. Endorsements: ‘What Natalie Burt has done here is remarkable. She has written a luminously honest, very funny, often very touching voyage of what it is actually like to be afflicted with the unquenchable desire to dedicate oneself to being a professional actor.’ Timothy Spall O.B.E(ese) ‘A refreshing and entertaining take on the challenges facing actors and how best to surmount them.’ Ben Seale, Managing Partner, Spotlight ‘Natalie’s book is like her acting: playful, irreverent, and accomplished. An invaluable resource.’ Laurie Sansom, Artistic Director, National Theatre of Scotland ‘At last! The book all aspiring actors have been waiting for. A truthful, comprehensive, funny guide to life as a jobbing and sometimes not jobbing actor.’ Caroline Quentin ‘The best book ever written.’ Natalie’s mum

The Secret Game of Power

2014-02
The Secret Game of Power

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  • Author: Florin Lupusoru
  • Publisher: Author House
  • ISBN: 1491895233
  • Category : Fiction
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 223

A highly controversial work of satirical fiction, mocking the obsessions, trends and rules of the modern society, challenging scientific theories, questioning political decisions and suggesting astonishing and original solutions to the dilemmas of our era.

Spin Glasses

2016-06-28
Spin Glasses

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  • Author: Marco Baity Jesi
  • Publisher: Springer
  • ISBN: 3319412310
  • Category : Science
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 221

This thesis addresses the surprising features of zero-temperature statics and dynamics of several spin glass models, including correlations between soft spins that arise spontaneously during avalanches, and the discovery of localized states that involve the presence of two-level systems. It also presents the only detailed historiographical research on the spin glass theory. Despite the extreme simplicity of their definition, spin glasses display a wide variety of non-trivial behaviors that are not yet fully understood. In this thesis the author sheds light on some of these, focusing on both the search for phase transitions under perturbations of Hamiltonians and the zero-temperature properties and responses to external stimuli. After introducing spin glasses and useful concepts on phase transitions and numerics, the results of two massive Monte Carlo campaigns on three-dimensional systems are presented: The first of these examines the de Almeida–Thouless transition, and proposes a new finite-size scaling ansatz, which accelerates the convergence to the thermodynamic limit. The second reconstructs the phase diagram of the Heisenberg spin glass with random exchange anisotropy.

Finding Your Way in Seminary

2016-10-01
Finding Your Way in Seminary

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  • Author: David M. Mellott
  • Publisher: Westminster John Knox Press
  • ISBN: 1611647606
  • Category : Religion
  • Languages : en
  • Pages : 199

Those considering seminary, those in seminary, and those preparing to graduate from seminary need help. They need help discerning their call, moving into the bewildering world of theological study, and balancing the competing claims of school, work, and family. This book proposes to offer that help, and more, because the seminary eperience is evolving more rapidly than at any time in its history. This book is an ideal textbook for introductory seminary or spiritual formation courses that the majority of seminaries now require of first-year students. The three sections of this book provide information and guidance to those who are discerning a call to ministry and considering theological education; introduces new seminarians to thinking theologically, forming supportive relationships, integrating what they are learning in school with their spiritual lives, and practical guidance on such matters is serving a local congregation while one is in seminary; and offers advice on negotiating the ordination process in different denominational traditions and making the transition from study to full-time ministry.